Em Is Trippin'....literally

Faceplanting in China...CHECK! That's right, turns out my blog is a double entendre. Something I, and most people who know me, find ludicrous and humorous, is the fact that I am the Phy-Ed teacher at the school I work at in Beijing. I like to call myself the athletic director (AD for short, of course). Considering that I slid into the splits (accidentally) and broke my shoe on the first day should tell you something about the irony of this situation. In my past 24 years I also have accidentally bonked a kid in the head with a (PLASTIC!) baseball bat, whacked my 7th grade teacher in the head with a golf club, fallen off the back of a gator, gotten trapped in an inflatable obstacle course, and gotten my skort hung on a nail so that I was hanging 10 inches from the ground (granted this was in third grade) to name a few of my klutzy moments.

Unfortunately, this one doesn't come with a great story. I'd love to say that I saved a child from one of the rogue buses. Or it would be great if I could say it was whilst defeating Mongols on the great wall...oh wait, wrong time period...but, alas, this faceplant was relatively mundane. It was a typical day in Beijing: I was walking and tripping (I trip approximately 6.2 times a day), but one trip went terribly wrong. Instead of tripping, flailing my arms around for a bit, and then steadying myself, I tripped, flailed my arms, realized I wasn't going to steady myself, dropped to my knees, flailed my arms a bit more, realized I was still going down, and then dropped to my face. However, we were on the move to make the last subway, so I got up, and continued hobbling toward the sub station. On they way my friends notified that my face was bleeding...that happens.

The scabs kind of made me look tough...they peeled off already and I was somewhat disappointed. Even this picture doesn't show the garish look of my lacerations during the first four days. Still, I'll just add to my campaign strategies for not coaching a sport back in America.

And I was like China, China, China, OHHHHH

There are somethings that I was pretty sure would not follow me to China. Cheese was one of them. Justin Bieber was another. Darn if "the Bieb" isn't international! During the past month (that's right, I have celebrated my 1 month anniversary of being "Beijing-ren") that teen pop sensation has been cropping up with surprising regularity in "middle country" (what "zhong-guo", the Chinese name for China means....not a bad J.R.R. Tolkein reference).

Bieber Fever Example #1: One of my students using Bieber as their example for a noun. After all, a noun is a person place or thing. When asked to come up with an adjective to describe her noun, she said "dreamy". I. Was. So. Proud. She got what an adjective was!!!

Bieber Fever Example #2: My students, in music class, playing Justin Bieber as one of their "favorite songs".

Bieber Fever Example #3: A mid-20s man, standing next to D on the bus on our way to the Great Wall, singing "Baby, baby, baby, OH"...he had sunglasses, an iPod, a blazer, and trumpet case, and was probably trying to impress D with his suaveness...maybe he doesn't realize that in the U.S., Justin's demographic is pre-tween girls.

Bieber Fever Example #4: Bieber and Jay-Z blasted on the beach of "Bei Dai He"...our mini-vacation spot.

Bieber Fever Example #5: My friends have a student whose English name is Justin Bieber...that's right...he named himself after the girly-boy.

Y'know...they said I'd have culture shock in this country...but somethings are universal and know no language barrier...turns out Justin Bieber is one of them.

婚礼 WEDDING

This past weekend the FC Beijing-ren got to attend a wedding. T and Fiona, blessings! Thanks for letting us be a part of it!

Unfortunately, due to my camera screen being busticated, many pics are not so hot and all of the ones of the couple were a failure...blast. Here are some that turned out halfway decently.

B, D, and I were accidental "black bridesmaids".

B also played the part of "mixmaster" and making sure that the preservice, processional, recessional, and dinner music was flowing. She basically looked like J.Lo a la "The Wedding Planner."

H played the part of "Papparazzi" (cue Lady Gaga) and took some sweet pics!

The greatest bridesmaids...and me: Gretl, Dolphin, me, and Hilary.

The pavilion before the event. Only half an hour later this place was filled with guests, confetti from the poppers that were used while the bride walked down the aisle, and the happy sounds of h*mns and clapping.

Wa ur ma

That's right folks...we have Wal-Mart. That's also right folks...we do have duck neck at our Wal-Mart, or "Wa ur ma" as it is fondly known as here.

蓝色 BLUE!

A rare blue sky over Beijing the day after rain.

Zhege

Word: Zhege
Prounciation: juh-guh
Meaning: this
Award:"First 2 Weeks in China MVP"

Why is "this" such a great word? Although it might seem tiny and insignificant, to a fledgling Chinese speaker in a Chinese world, it is invaluable.

Uses:

1. To fix a bike. I own a bike! Along with my subway/bus card and cell phone, this was my other "you are now Beijingren" purchase (Beijingren=beijing peeps...somewhat like Eich bin ein Berliner). HOWEVER, my bike is named Lazarus for a reason. It has made a wonderful recovery since when I first laid eyes on it. Would it be rideable had I not been able to use the word "zhege"? I just don't know. I have been our corner bike people 3 times to get it to this point, each time pointing to something and saying variations on "zhege shi bu hao" (this is no good). The chain, the brakes, the bike in general when I didn't know what was wrong with it, all have received the "point and zhege" treatment. Combined with pantomiming and zhege cannot be stopped. I can point to the rain guard on the front of the bike and say "zhege DONK DONK DONK" to express that it's hitting the front tire. I now have a functioning way of self-navigating the Beijing streets and haven't gotten hit....yet! Sure, Ole Laz still sounds like he's ready to into the grave, but I think he's just saying "Hello, ni hao, it's good to be back."

2. To point to something delicious in a restaurant, grocery store, or street food stand. Dumplings, hot pot, curry, schwar (sp?), Makes you wanna come visit, eh?

3. To ask an Ikea employee about a particular lamp shade. That's right. We went to Beijing Ikea last night. After taking the subway to as close as we could, we attempted to hail a taxi whilst standing in the rain for 30 minutes. We finally decided to walk a ways to another corner and when we turned there, what did we see but the bright blue and yellow lights of the Swedish mega-store. So we hoofed it. The enormity of the lights was deceiving because the couches, lamps, and DIY assemble furniture was still a ways off, but we did it and soon were enjoying 1 kwai ice creams and 3 kwai hot dogs (plus, it's tradition). Also, we saved ourselves a 10 kwai taxi trip and they always say "10 kwai saved is 10 kwai earned"....or not because we soon spent it.

4. To be encouraged. I don't understand much of what people say yet, so whenever I hear "zhege" a little flag goes off in my mind and I think "I KNOW THAT ONE! I practically know Chinese!"....ok, so maybe not, but I'm working on it! I just started classes this week. Hopefully soon my regular productive vocabulary will increase to at least 5 words!

I have been having a fantastic time in China. I have started classes (I even get to teach Spanish! More on that in another post). I have mastered the bike ride to the school (yeah, there's only one turn). I have bartered in Chinese for a power strip and Angry Bird stickers. I think I've come a long ways! ;)

Most of all, I have gotten to Study. Several people told us during training "you go there thinking that you will change China, but China changes you". I can't wait to grow with my Studies. On Wednesday I got to eat with a family and study with 5 kids. That's just a fa-th boost. What an amazing opportunity that He has given us. He is omnipresent and certainly in China. "Zhege" is so awesome!

Until next time (I'll make it shorter, I promise!)